Melody in the Canyonville choir |
Living (with) abroad in Tuscany
Paul and Lucy Spadoni periodically live in Tuscany to explore Paul’s Italian roots, practice their Italian and enjoy “la dolce vita.” Paul is the author of "An American Family in Italy: Living La Dolce Vita without Permission," an Amazon bestseller. All work is copyrighted and may not be reprinted without written permission from the author, who can be contacted at www.paulspadoni.com
Monday, March 11, 2024
A tribute to my late friend Melody, who played a vital role in my life
Monday, February 26, 2024
Why do Americans often call their Italian grandmothers Nonni?
Is your Italian grandmother supposed to be called Nonna, Nona, Nonni, Noni or even something else? This is a frequent point of debate in many of the Italian and Italian American discussion groups to which I belong. Well, I’m here to give you the definitive and final answer!
That’s a joke, because there
is no such thing in such a hotly debated discussion, especially when Italians are involved! There can only be a reasoned and
educated opinion, which is what I hope to provide, a voice from experience.
My own Nonna, Anita Seghieri |
One possibility is that immigrants sometimes called their
grandmothers Nonnina, which is an affectionate and diminutive form of Nonna. My
dad had an aunt named Rosa, but everyone in the family knew her as Rosina. It
could be that some people started shortening Nonnina to Nonni.
However, a much more likely answer is that these early grandmothers had come to America, and they and their families started adopting the American custom of using the “i” “y” or “ie” ending as a term of endearment or affection. In American, children often change dad to daddy, mom to mommy, aunt to aunty, and grandmother to granny or grammy. The same is true of dozens of Italian given names: Antonio became Tony, Vincenzo to Vinny, Francesco to Frankie, Salvatore to Sally or Solly, Roberto to Bobby, Giovanni to Johnny or Gianni, Paolo to Paulie.
Another possible reason could be that some children found
Nonni easier to pronounce than Nonna. Stephanie Beddia, now of South Carolina,
notes, “I was supposed to be Nonna, but when my first grandson started to talk,
he just kept saying, ‘Nonni, Nonni, Nonni.’”
Obviously, the Italian grandmothers knew the correct term, but most did not object to being called Nonni instead of Nonna, understanding that it was a term of endearment in America. My given name is Paul, but I don’t mind if Italian Americans call me Paulie or Italians call me Paolo. In a way, it is flattering, because it signifies that they accept me as belonging in their communities.
Grandmothers accepted or even embraced this American version because, well, they were now in America. If that’s the way people spoke in America, then Italian grandmothers accepted the slight change. Kids were already taught to say Daddy and Mommy instead of Babbo and Mamma, because it was important to be considered American. President Theodore Roosevelt said, in 1915: “There is no room in this country for hyphenated Americanism. A hyphenated American is not an American at all.” He was speaking to persons who referred to themselves as Italian-Americans, Irish-Americans, etc. Thus, it’s not hard to see why Italian immigrants were willing to adopt American customs.
One final comment on this: Whenever this topic is
discussed, it will provoke comments such as, “Using Nonni to refer to an
Italian grandmother is a bastardization of the language and just shows the
ignorance of Americans. This would never be accepted in Italy.”
This kind of arrogance troubles me. Yes, I know that Nonna
is the word of choice in Italy, but Italy is a land full of dialectical
differences. The Italian spoken in America by our immigrant forebears is also a
dialect, and it should be respected as such and not denigrated and regarded as inferior to other dialects.
In the words of New Yorker Amber Preston: “It’s a grandparent’s prerogative to be called by any name they want by their grandchildren, period. It’s not a choice for anyone else to judge.”
Thursday, January 25, 2024
It's wins all around for people and their happy, smiling doggies!
A win-win situation is generally acknowledged as the best
possible outcome, but when you throw some dogs into the mix, there is something
even better: a win-win-win situation. How does this situation come about?
Lucy and I have 12 acres of beautiful, wooded property in Rosedale that I walked on maybe five times a year. We’ve kept it mostly untouched because we love nature and the peace and quiet of walking in the woods, combined with the knowledge that these woods have been in my family since 1945. However, keeping this land intact has been a drain on our budget. In 2023, we paid $5,468 in property taxes, up from an average of $5,000 over the previous five years—meaning that each walk we took essentially was costing us $1,000 in taxes alone, not exactly what a person would consider a “win.”
The only people really getting a good deal were my neighbors. We saw no reason to restrict them from taking quiet strolls or riding their bikes, motorcycles or horses, or even building an occasional tree house. We didn’t begrudge them these pleasures, so we kept the land unfenced and unposted. And, of course, it was always in the back of our minds that we could one day sell the land to fund our retirement—though this would be a painful last resort, as it would ultimately lead to the end of the forest as I had known it since infancy.
Then along came a man named David Adams, who changed everything five years ago when he invented something he named Sniffspot. He and his fiancé were having a hard time finding places to let their dogs roam free without interacting with other dogs and humans, so David created what he calls an Airbnb for dogs. It is basically a website that lets dog owners search for land owned by other people who are willing to rent their yards, field or woods for private visits. The website handles the reservations, payments and advertising, provides liability insurance and allows for both customer and client reviews.
I signed up to be a Sniffspot host in the summer of 2020, calling my spot The Woods at Spadoni Hill, but I averaged only about three customers a month. And then I had to shut down about six months later because too many neighbors were accustomed to using the property for free. I had about a dozen great reviews, but a few terrible ones where customers had reserved the site and then encountered other people walking dogs or picking berries. One of the main attractions of Sniffspot is that “reactive” dogs will have free reign without the possibility of encountering other people or dogs, and I realized that despite my best efforts to explain this situation to neighbors, I couldn’t guarantee this exclusivity. The main problem was that I had way more neighbors than I had imagined, and I had never met many of them; some didn’t even live in my neighborhood.
In the fall of 2022, I spent about $5,000 on fencing and signage and reopened in December. Ever since, I’ve been amazed at the results. Perhaps it’s because more people have heard about Sniffspot, or maybe it was the increased fencing, but visits increased exponentially. Now I’m making enough to pay the property taxes, with some extra beyond that has helped us add new trails, picnic tables, a covered shelter, trail signs, and a portable toilet. In addition, my daughter Suzye and I have planted more than 1,000 cedar and fir seedlings and started a process to reduce or maybe even eliminate invasive non-native plants. She and I both love the exercise, tranquility and satisfaction we gain while working to improve the site.
This is definitely a win for our family, and whereas before maybe 30 neighbors were using the trails, we had more than 100 visitors in 2023, so it’s a win for the community. We’ve now decided we will never need to sell the property, so it will remain a wooded paradise for as long as I live and probably much, much longer, another plus for the community.
And as for the third win, just look at the smiling faces of the doggies who have the rare opportunity to run free and use all of their senses to explore. The accompanying photos were just a few taken by the dog owners and posted along with reviews telling how much their pets enjoyed our property. These dogs can’t verbalize, but I think they say a lot with their flopping tongues, wagging tails and toothy grins. Just looking at some of these photos is enough to make my day brighter, and if that’s not enough, then I can read some of the reviews. Like this sampling:
Jessica K.: It’s like a hiking trail. Well marked parking instructions and they even put out printed maps of the trail. I thought it was really special.
Rowan D: My dog had an absolute blast in the woods.
Lynn G.: Wonderful, clean, safe place for pups. Has
everything that you could want: trails, trees, lots of sniffs and water
available for pups.
Caelyn C.: My dogs were over the moon—plenty of space to run and explore and even play fetch.
Christine N.: We took our two pups here for the first time
today and it was incredible! They loved all the trails, and it was a great
place for recall training.
Jannnine C.: This is a great setup for those fur babies who
prefer solitude without other 🐕 My Max was so happy to have
great walking trails where he could roam and run.
Rebekah J.: A lovely, peaceful forest walk, as always. This Sniffspot has become an absolute treasure for us to visit and explore. The host is always adding new features for the sniffers and the humans to enjoy.
Casey P.: Big enough to really explore, let your dogs off
leash, and practice recall without being so huge you get lost! Made for a fun
afternoon for us and the fur babies!
Rachel W.: Our dog loved being able to run on the trails
and jump over the rocks and trees and branches.
Teri K.: This Sniffspot is my dogs’ favorite. Trails, exploring, lots of smells. Running, jumping, forging through ferns. It’s our go-to!
Kara S.: We had a blast exploring the trails and loved how
there was a printed map at the entrance. There were different spots along the
trails that had seating and water for the pups.
Keri H.: Super private which was great since our dogs can
be picky about strangers. Tons of trails and things for the dogs to sniff, run
around, and burn the energy. Extremely clean, water at various different
locations, just an overall great place.
Susan C.: Doggy people nirvana!!!! As always it was above and beyond. I brought a friend visiting from California and she didn’t want to leave!
Brittany G.: Amazing spot! Our two dogs had the best time
sprinting on the trails. Can’t recommend this spot more. The many water bowls
with containers of water next to it was such a nice touch.
Thursday, December 28, 2023
Want to move to Italy? Start by reading this entertaining book
“An American Family in Italy,” published in 2015, gives an account of a year our family spent in Padova, Italy, in 2001-02. Also in 2015, we bought a home in the hilltop village of Montecarlo, in Northern Tuscany. One would think that with eight years of experience living off and on in Italy that by now I would have written a second book detailing the joys and tribulations of living La Dolce Vita as an Italian citizen and resident. I’ve blogged about it extensively, so how much effort would it take to transform those blog entries into a book?
Apparently, too much, because the second book is still
far from reality, and I don’t much care. It turns out that it’s way more fun living
the sweet life than it is to go through the pain of editing, formatting, designing
a cover and marketing. Especially marketing.
Matt and Zeneba in their new town of Soriano Nel Cimino, about an hour north of Rome. |
So if you really want to read about our experiences in Tuscan living, start in the early years of my blog and read on. You can skip past the boring entries about my genealogical discoveries. But if you want to instead read a paperback or e-book about the process of buying a house and moving to Italy, I can recommend several very good ones already in print. One recently published account is by Matt Walker and Zeneba Bowers, who sold almost all their possessions in the United States and moved to Soriano in Lazio at just about the same time that Covid-19 struck hard in all of Italy, adding to the already difficult process of starting a new life.
The book is titled “I Can’t Believe We Live Here: TheWild But True Story of How We Dropped Everything in the States and Moved toItaly, Right Before the End of the World.” Despite the long title, the book is
a pleasant and easy read at 159 well-written pages.
Almost every evening during the lockdown, Matt & Zeneba serenaded neighbors from their balcony. |
Zeneba and Matt are accomplished concert musicians,
and now they organize and perform concerts in Italy. They also run a travel business
called LittleRoadsEurope.com, have published four guidebooks and create
itineraries for clients.
On their website, they write “Our vast base of
knowledge of affordable but luxurious lodgings, authentic eateries, and
little-known, off-the-beaten-track sights has enabled us to craft hundreds of
itineraries for travelers. Most of our travelers are honeymooners, couples on
their anniversary trips, and families wanting their kids to experience a ‘real’
Europe that the big tourist crowds miss. We work with each client personally
and extensively, to create custom itineraries for all types of small groups
with different travel objectives. Wherever we go, our goal is to fit in with
the locals in the town; to experience life there beyond the surface one might
find as a random tourist; to slow down and take time to actually see and
experience what is around us; and to learn about the food, culture and history
of the area—all without getting bogged down in the big tourist crowds.”
Friday, October 6, 2023
Wrapping up with random thoughts on our past month in Montecarlo
Ø
When we first started living in Italy, I wrote many blog
posts—at least every other day. Now I write rarely and sporadically. The
reasons are various. I am enjoying la dolce vita, and writing is
work. Also, I have grown accustomed to the differences between Italian and
American culture now, so what might have struck me as an interesting cultural
observation previously I now consider routine.
Cena at Ca' Sandra with Elena and Davide. |
Ø
I’ve done almost all the genealogical research that can be
easily done, tracing my Seghieri family line back to the 1200s and Spadoni line
to the 1400s. I’ve also met a ton of relatives named Seghieri and Spadoni, some
as distant as 12th cousin 3 generations removed. I could go out of my way to
meet more, but it’s no longer such a novelty.
Ø
We’re becoming friends with three couples—one Norwegian and
two American—who have purchased unfinished or crumbling old homes near us. All
three have accomplished incredibly gorgeous transformations (one is still in
the final stages). Are we jealous? Not in the slightest, though we are super
impressed with what they’ve done. We already have a beautiful country home in
Gig Harbor. We decided long ago that when we come to Montecarlo, we just want
to focus on living a relaxed Italian lifestyle of pensionati (retired
people). Our home is neither beautiful nor modern, and we have no intention of
changing it.
Ø
We have a lot of older wooden furniture, some that came
with the home and some we bought at second-hand stores. With old wood comes the
risk of our invasion by our worst enemies here, tarli—wood worms.
We had tarli in our roof beams when we moved here in 2015, but we were able to
eliminate them with treatment and paint. However, last spring we noticed some
sawdust under a couple of chairs. We’ve tossed those chairs away, but when I
did a more thorough inspection, I found at least six chairs, a table and a
cabinet with dozens of tiny holes in each. I’ve spent several days injecting
the holes with insecticide, using a syringe, and then filling the holes with
putty. Now I’m coating them with a transparent protective spray.
Ø
Electric bikes are awesome! We only rented a car for our
first six days here, stocking up on some larger grocery items and taking trips
to Lucca and the Valleriana—the valley above Pescia with 10 medieval cities.
Since then, we’ve just done everything on our bikes. It helps that we have
weather in the high 70s to low 80s every day, and it’s only rained for about
two hours in the last month.
Ø
We are leaving Montecarlo tomorrow for Athens, Greece,
where we will meet up with Dan, Sandra and their kids for their fall break.
After nine days there, we’ll head to Napoli and meet up with Linda, Wendy and
Janet for a week in Southern Italy, and then we take a week-long cruise
starting in Bari and ending in Salerno. From there, it will be back to
Montecarlo, but just for a couple of days, and then it will be back to the USA.
Ø We will miss Montecarlo, but we’re also missing Gig Harbor. We seem to stay just long enough in one place such that we’re always satisfied—and then looking forward to going to the other place.
Sunday, September 24, 2023
A delicious love feast at our Altopascio church helps us make connections
We had to good fortune to be in Montecarlo during the time our church here, La Chiesa Evangelica di Altopascio, decided to have an agape—which could be translated as a love feast (mentioned in Jude 1:12), or more simply, a church potluck lunch.
I found it mildly amusing when l’agape was announced from the pulpit two weeks ago by Pastor Giuseppe. He explained that everyone should bring food enough for their families and share it with others. His description could have been summed up with one word, potluck, but apparently there is not an equivalent term in Italian. In fact, I used Google translate, and potluck in English translates to potluck in Italian, with a suggestion that “pasto alla buona” might also work.
Anyway, we were happy to join in,
because a major reason we come to Italy is to make connections with the locals,
to learn Italian, to experience the culture. We love our Italian church for many
reasons, but it’s difficult for us to make deep connections because we’re not fluent
in Italian, and we’re only here for about three months a year. A potluck would
help us become closer to the church community and allow us to practice out
Italian.
Because we’re dependent for
transportation on our e-bikes, Lucy decided to make two kinds of cookies
(chocolate chip and magic cookie bars), because they’d be easier to carry than
a pasta dish or casserole. We had a little more than an hour to kill between
the end of the church service and the start of the agape, so we walked into the
centro to get an espresso and dolce, while others drove
home to heat up their meals.
We sat near Michele and his wife Giuseppina, and Aurelio—very kind people about our age who in past years have made an effort to talk to us. We spoke of our children and grandchildren, our occupations, our church experiences and our travel experiences and plans. Nothing particularly deep, but much better than the usual exchange of short greetings that usually take place at the end of the church service.
The food, as could be expected, was eccezionale,
squisito, delizioso. The gastronomy organization TasteAtlas ranks Italian
cuisine the best in the world, and I’m not about to pick an argument with these
experts.
If only we could do this more often,
we’d make some big steps in our integration into Italian society. However, it’s
a choice we’ve made, dividing our lives between two paradises on earth,
Montecarlo, Toscana, and Gig Harbor, Washington. There are some drawbacks to
this split lifestyle, but the rewards outweigh these small first world
problems. Piano, piano, we are making progress.
Thursday, September 21, 2023
A pranzo di lavoro is one of Italy’s most enjoyable midday bargains
Lucy enjoying her penne al ragu' at La Pieve. |
What, exactly, is a pranzo di lavoro, and why it is
special? The most literal translation would be a worker’s lunch, though some
translate it as a business lunch. The amazing aspect is a combination of
factors: terrific food, completeness, speed of service and great price.
The pasta dishes at our favorite restaurants are generously sized, to say the least. |
Delicious chicken filets grilled to perfection, with contorni of ceci (chickpeas) and spinach. Squeeze on some lemon and drizzle some extra virgin olive oil for added flavor. |
A group of hard-working men gather for a pranzo di lavoro. |
How much should one expect to pay for such a complete and
satisfying meal? At a normal restaurant, a primo might cost from 10-12 euro, a
secondo from 12-20, a contorno about 3. A glass of wine about 4 euro, water
perhaps 1, and an espresso probably 2. Then there is the coperto,
the cover charge, which would be 2-3 euro. Add all that up, and the cheapest
lunch would cost you 34 euro.
So what is the price of a pranzo di lavoro at our two favorite restaurants? Drum roll, please! We get scrumptious full meals not for 34 euro, not for 24, not even for 16. We pay only 12 euro! We've also found another nearby restaurant that charges only 8 euro, but wine is not included, and we have to chose either a primo and secondo, not both.
One might think the restaurants sacrifice quantity to save
some money, but that’s not the case. If fact, the pasta dish itself would be a
full meal. If we ate the entire primo piatto, we’d be so stuffed that we
couldn’t continue, so Lucy and I have learned to bring little plastic boxes to
take home about half of the primo and maybe a quarter of the secondo, which
means we’re essentially getting another half a meal for free. Knowing it’s not
customary to bring food home from a restaurant in Italy, we do it as discretely
as possible to avoid making la brutta figura.
Our two go-to restaurants are I Tre Angeli in Pescia, right
next to the Esselunga, and La Pieve in Castelvecchio, one of the castle cities
in the Valleriana. I Tre Angeli is always packed at lunch, and we’ve learned
that it’s a good idea to make reservations, though we’ve never been turned away
without them. La Pieve, being more remote, is usually not full. However, the
last time we were there, the owner said we should call ahead if we wanted the
pranzo di lavoro. This meal is designed for the regular customers, not
tourists, so she would like to know if we are coming ahead of time so she can
plan accordingly.
We rode our bikes to this restaurant, but we were disappointed to find that they only open at lunch if enough people make reservations. |
I believe that if a restaurant puts up a pranzo di lavoro sign, they will probably provide it to anyone who asks. However, most tourists are not aware of this bargain meal, so they usually end up ordering off the menu and paying much more, while those in the know around them are dining at the special rate. While we don’t dine out often, we now know to keep our eyes open for those special signs. We wouldn’t mind having three or four favorite restaurants.
Monday, September 18, 2023
We find a new and much better entrance to the Lago di Sibolla
In the last two days, we’ve gone on three bike rides, once
to church, once to the cinema in Altopascio (to watch A Haunting in
Venice) and once to the Lago (Lake) di Sibolla Riserva Naturale. The
weather in Tuscany is just about perfect in September. The days are in the low
to mid 80s, and the nights in the mid 60s (around 18-28 degrees Celsius).The main entrance,
closed as usual.
The Lago di Sibolla is more of a park for wild animals than a park for people to go for picnics or play. It’s not that people are forbidden to enter, but the main entrance is locked about 99 percent of the time. About 10 years ago, using Google maps, I noticed a sort of secret entrance to the lake property. Lucy and I would use this little-known side entrance every so often to walk on poorly maintained trails over some scrubby land east of the lake, and last year we took our friends Wendy and Dave for a walk to this special wilderness preserve. However, we could barely see the lake because of the heavy undergrowth and marshes that surround it. The water in the shallow marshes wasn’t deep enough to sustain much visible wildlife, so there wasn’t much to see other than the occasional rabbit. We did see a lot of herons and egrets fly by to land on or near the lake, but it was always from a distance.
Well, that changed on Saturday, as I discovered another unmarked entrance, one that is 10 times better than the first one, on a road branching off from Via Ponti ai Pini. This one led to a wooded trail that winds about one kilometer from the east side of the lake along the southern end and comes out on the west side—leading to a footbridge through the marshlands that ends on a small platform right on the edge of the lake. Even better, the platform has a viewing shack with peepholes in it, so one can observe the birds on the lake without them being aware of or frightened by our presence.
One of many turtles we saw. |
The trail also led to the main entrance on the far west side of the preserve, which, as usual, was locked. Near the entrance is a good-sized building which is probably used for nature talks on the rare occasions when the preserve is open. Unfortunately, there are no picnic tables, but there is a large flat area among the trees, covered with pine needles. We sat down, opened our backpacks and enjoyed the snacks we had brought. We had the place all to ourselves, though at one point a car pulled up to the locked gate and watched us briefly through the chain link fence—probably wondering how we were able to get inside.
Even though it was a Saturday, we saw only two other
families during our time on the trails, so we know that few of the locals are
aware of the unmarked entrance we had discovered. We look forward to returning
here for further communion with nature. Our only regret is that we didn’t bring
insect repellent, because there are a few tiny buzzing species of lake wildlife
that we don’t appreciate.See the heron?